ASSASSINS. Directed by Richard Donner; written by Andy Wachowski, Larry Wachowski and Brian Helgeland; produced by Richard Donner for Warner Bros. Starring Sylvester Stallone, Antonio Banderas and Julianne Moore. Rated R.
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If a movie with as high a body count as Assassins can be called silly, then it is truly silly.
Now, some of the silliness, especially that involving Banderas, makes it all the way to humor, recalling some of the entertaining moments from director Donner's Lethal Weapon movies.
But most of it just stays silliness, although it's the same kind of silliness that Stallone movies always have. (You know, wildly improbable plots, crazy stunts and, above all, Stallone giving his continuing imitation of a block of granite.) And some people insist on liking those movies enough that he's always being encouraged to make more. For the life of me, I can't see why. If you're one of those Stallone fans, though, then you'll like Assassins much better than I did.
The plot idea here is that Rath (Stallone) is a highly skilled, experienced, but increasingly weary international hit man. He's thinking about retiring until one of his "marks" is taken, right before his eyes, by a young upstart (Banderas). From then on, the conflicts in the story aren't so much between the hitmen and their targets as between Rath and Bain (the upstart).
Banderas must have felt challenged to make up the emotive and energy deficit that Stallone creates with his monosyllabic, no-reaction style of acting. The kid is 'way over the top here, much more outrageous than he was in Desperado. But though he's often chillingly oblivious to who he kills and why, he's also a lot of fun to watch.
Moore, as a computer wizard trying to sell pirated satellite data to (apparently) the wrong buyers, doesn't quite click the way she's supposed to with Rath. But we can't blame her too much for that; it's hard to generate sparks with a bump on a log.
The action scenes are what fans of these movies care about, though, and Assassins does a good job here. Highlights are a standoff in a cab with bullet-proof glass between Rath and Bain and the final showdown in a ruined hotel where Rath uses Bain's hyperactivity against him.
Some fans may be disappointed, but the violence, in spite of the numbers blown away (including several innocent bystanders) isn't very graphic. Just good, clean fun for fans of Sylvester Stallone.
October 25, 1995